| Text: | Hello and welcome to the Kenzterview! I firstly should apologize for the delay which made System 3 look as if their release schedules could be trusted, but I've been writing articles for every '64 fanzine, left, right, centre and somewhere else! So, time to get on with it...
Here I am live at Zaw Towers with time off work and so I'm writing this scrolltext, with none other than the Dalton-In-Furness branch of the Suicidal Tendencies fan club (ie Danny G). So we're moshing now to some Nine Inch Nails at this moment ('Sin rules!!' - Dan.) Incase you're wondering where my greetings are, I've got NONE this time, as your ego can be suitably raised by reading the bottom scrolltext which none other than Kenz has typed on his smellyvision.
Cool concert moment number one: I went to see Throwing Muses live at Manchester Academy last February, and apart from Kristin Hersh being a total utter BABE, she instantly made friends with all of Manchester by coming back on for the encore and proclaiming a la Butthead 'Whoa! Manchester's COOOL!'.
Have you seen the October issue of Sky magazine yet? All I can say is BUY IT and just ogle between pages 8 to 16, I'm not going to tell you who is there but I'll give you a clue: it's a babe!
It's chocabloc in Manchester now all the studes are back and what I want to know is why are Manchester stoodes wearing Blur, Oasis and Supergrass T-shirts? I mean, Britpop - what a dull concept. Blame Melody Maker for that!
If you want to hear great music, and you're a first year stude here at Manchester, you have two options: 1. Walk down my road after 6pm and hear the pleasing music being played out of my stereo, or 2. Listen to Ash, Cabaret Voltaire, Coil, Creeper, Dub War, Fatima Mansions, The Family Cat, Front Line Assembly, Garbage, Juliana Hatfield, Jesus And Mary Chain, Lush, Machine Head, Ned's Atomic Dustbin, Nine Inch Nails, Nitzer Ebb, Obituary, Offspring, Pixies, Pop Will Eat Itself, Renegade Soundwave, Rollins Band, Senser, Skunk Anansie, Sonic Youth, Suicidal Tendencies, (yesssss! rrrrrock! -Dan) Throwing Muses, Trumans Water, Wedding Present, Wolfgang Press and anyone else whose CD's adorn my bedroom!
Cool concert moment number two: I went to see Ash at Manchester Boardwalk in August, and they played ace, with 'Jack Names The Planets' being superb. Obviously indie kid was waiting for 'Girl From Mars' and they got it! Mikey from Powercuts' mate Ben was crowdsurfing ahoy! But the cool bit was that the band chatted to loads of people afterwards, and I got to play table football with Mark the bassist! (and for any Ash fans reading, he's darned good at it as well!)
Lyric of the month from Dead Milkmen: 'Do you ever go to make a pork sausage, and find it's got hairs all over it? And he gives me a look! which still chills me to this day.' Err...
I'd just like to say well done on the Europe team for winning the Ryder Cup and putting the Yanks in their place! Also, did you know that in Australia most couples make love (not war!) to NIN's 'Closer' (yesss! the 'Closer To God' version rocks!! - Dan.) so maybe I should try it out when I go out with a female sometime.
Mariah Carey - talk about utter clag! Simply Red dared to sample the Goodmen's 'Give It Up' on their new single, and now they're at number one! Pah! (Who bought that 'record'? - Dan.)
There are some very sad people buying chart records at the moment. HMV did open at midnight on Sunday for the clag Oasis album. I went past at 9.50pm coming back from Suicyco Industries HQ (ie Dan's house) and 80 sad people were queueing up! (That sucks! Heh heh!-Dan.) But Vinyl Exchange and Powercuts rule! And Dan and I went there Saturday, and bought oodles of CD's between us, and guess what? They are excellent! Even better was that we pigged out in Babylon, scoffed our faces with pizza, and then relocated to Zaw Towers for some brilliant ROCK! You wanna know why? Cos I'm a LIAR!! Thanks Henry Rollins for that little line.
I wonder how many people have stopped watching Brookside now that Anna 'why is she going out with Darren 'Dillhole' Day?' Friel has left? I also wonder how many Man Utd fans turned into work on 21st September after being humiliated, humbled and taitered by YORK CITY! Ha ha ha ha ha! Even better as a certain kung fu kicking Frenchman couldn't save them in the second leg either!!
Bring back Monkey, it's liked by all the major '64ers, and I know that Tim from Ash also used to watch it, so write to the BBC and demand it back! Write to Anne Robinson at 'Points Of View' NOW!
Incase you wanted a top ten list, you can't have one, but you can find out my top 5 Beavis and Butthead episodes, so in reverse order: 05 - Patients (Beavis' glasses look odd!), 04 - Safe Driving ('car crashes RULE!'), 03 - Rabies Scare ('Stupid dog! Aaaargh! - that wuz cool'), 02 - Liar! Liar! (not least for featuring Rollins Band and making Beavis out to be the 'hippy-ripper' just cos he says 'I killed a bunch of people once' to the lie detector!) and always at number 01 will be the ultimate episode, 'The Great Cornholio' (read the main interview text for more info, and get the cool window sticker with October's issue of the comic!).
And over to Dan for a quick message - take over the keyboard now! Okay Waz! Thanx dude! If you want some hypacool graphics, for the Miggie or '64, then contact Suicyco Industries at 22 Longton Road, Irlams O' Th' Height, Salford, M6 7QW .....Suicyco Industries - Pledge Your Allegiance!
Indeed Dan! All together now kids, S! T! Dun dunna dunna dun! S! T! Now I'm back on the keys while some NIN is playing (again! -Dan.) as we felt like a change. Ultra sad award of 1995 goes to that bloke we saw in Piccadilly near the demolished bus station (demolition RULES! It RULES! - Dan.) cos he was wearing a They're Clag (I mean Take That) T-shirt. I wonder if it was Jason Finch in disguise, as if you read his scrolltexts he's always going on about them. Ahem...
Supermarket Sweep is back on the box, and Dale Winton is as odd as ever. Check it out, as they say on the programme. More like check how bad the contestants are! As if a small tin of tuna costs more than 1! Not even our rip off local shopkeeper charges that much..
ROCK! ROCK! as the new Clusterfunked demotape is playing loudly (hi Pete, Pete and Eric - Dan!) and it is far much better than their first!! Read my review of their new demotape 'Lunatic Soup' in a future issue of CZ...
Damon Hill keeps committing more 'driver errors' than ever and why they kept him on instead of Coulthard is a mystery. And who will Nigel Mansell sign for - Gremlin Graphics? Oh, he already did that. But NOT on the '64...
Another wacky recent jape: I was in Powercuts as I'd recorded Ash live on Radio 1 for Mikey, and he played the tape I'd done. Within 5 seconds Ben was moshing and the three of us were just going dool!! YESSS!
Well if you thought the Family Fortunes answer Kenz's dad gave was pretty clag, it pales into insignificance with this lot.. check this out! Name a way of cooking fish: Cod! Name a song with yellow in the title: Yellow banana! Name an annual sporting event: Running! Name something that jumps: A bubble! Name an article of clothing left on the bedroom floor: Pyjamas! Name something you do in a power cut: Switch the light on! Duh! to all those clag contestants. And one of them recently was my brother's mate's family!! They gave the answer about the song with yellow in the title.. oops! Well time to go and mosh to some well ace Front Line Assembly, as 'Victim Of A Criminal' from their 'Millenium' CD is playing, see you in the next Zaw demo... as Wire would have sung, I am the wrap..... |
